Watch your step...

Press reports say that thieves in the depressed town of Charleroi have been stealing manhole covers like no-one's business this summer. In the past two months over 50 have disappeared, leaving a bunch of holes around town. Thieves reportedly try to sell the covers for their value as scrap metal. Charleroi was the same town that not too long ago saw some local criminals use a bazooka on a police station, and local vandals also burnt half of the city's police cars in just one night....

A bad hair day?

One of my favorite blogs is Pestiside. It's from Budapest, and having been there twice alreday this year, it's, well, a very unique place. Pestiside outdid itself today.....

Horrific M1 crash almost ends in dry hair

France goes Anglo-Saxon (finally)

This one passed under the radar of most of the news services, but a recent law change is probably going to open up the job market in France to non-EU citizens…. well, ones with university degrees anyway. From January 1, if you meet the conditions (which have yet to be announced, BTW), you’ll be able to get a two-year renewable permit which allows you to go look for a job in France.

Translated, that means that if the French authorities decide that you’re good enough, you can apply for this permit without having a job lined up. With the permit in hand, you can then go find a job on your own. The UK already has a system like this, and the Netherlands is reportedly considering such a program.

Anyway, we’re still building the website, but there’s more to see over at Do It Yourself Expat, the first guide for non-EU nationals on working and living in the European Union.

Nuns chase down thief

I was in Amsterdam on the weekend, and the following news item just just too bizarre to pass up.

On Saturday the 23rd of July, two nuns in habits on bikes chased a thief through the southern part of Amsterdam. One of the two had recognized the man from pictures of a theft of church offerings some weeks before. The thief guy figured that he'd had an easy time of it, and went back for second pickings.

Inquiring at the church when the next service was, the first nun recognized him and invited him in, while alerting the second nun to call the cops. The thief got itchy feet, and took off.... so the nuns hopped on their bikes and went after him.

The GSM function of one of the mobiles of the nuns was on, so the police followed the signal, not sure what was going on. The thief managed to get into the centre of town, with the nuns still in pursuit, before the police caught up with the three, and the thief managed to get away. The fuzz do have fotos, though, and are reportedly on the lookout....

Click here for local news video...

I'm still here, just been trying to work out all of the bugs in my website. You know, it's surpising just how much their is to setting up and running even a website.

In the meantime, here's a small language tip- the middle of summer is called "cucumber season" in most of Northern Europe. That's because it's the time of year when everyone goes on vacation and nothing much happens except stuff growing in the garden. (Think of it as a slow news day that lasts from about mid-June to mid-August.) The phrase is literally translated and used in languages like German, Czech, Hungarian, Flemish, Polish and others. So when you hear it, well, you know it's the lazy part of summer.

Oh, wait, I have a blog? Dang, I forgot..... I definitely gotta get into the habit of updating this to make it interesting.

Venice revived?

Sick this past weekend, well that and watching the elections in Italy and Hungary with baited breath. Bizarrely, Austrian loudmouth and Kärntner Landeshauptmann Jörg Haider is now saying that he wants to stand for election in Italy in 2009. He also wants to revive the Venetian Republic (?!), or at least start a regional party which would call for the independence of Veneto. Their name would be Popoli Liberi della Serenissima. Personally I'm waiting for a revival of the Papal States and maybe even the State of Franklin!

Meanwhile, I'm wondering if a leftist government could sort out the morass that passes for Italy immigration system.

The Zen receptionist, pt. 1

The receptionist at my work has a wonderful way with words. English is not his first language, and while he speaks it pretty well, his written memos...well... have a certain lyrical quality. Usually they deal with mundane matters, like the office mail, cleaning up the kitchen, etc. So, enter (drumroll) the Zen receptionist. His message for today was:


Dear all,

Please if you have eaten: rice, pizza you name it, please clean up your dish before putting it in the dishwasher.
This morning I found dirty dish everywhere.
Thank you for you cooperation.
The dishwasher and his hands.

The Boklest... no, McCreevey... Services.... something

The (insert name here) Services Directive been getting a lot of press in Europe, but precious little elsewhere. Bascially it would open up cross-border services in the EU. This could be a boon to those with a business based in one country but working in another. If it sounds arcane, don't worry. The upshot may mean that Americans can more easily set up a business in one country, but then work in another (with all the right legalities, of course).

A new version of the law is being kicked around in Brussels, so watch this space....

Europe as a security risk

The US State Department has said that "unemployment, discrimination and lack of integration among Europe’s Muslim communities had created an "audience" open to extremist messages" and that this could constitute a security risk to the US. German interior minister Wolfgang Schauble came up with a "ja, vell ve can't help it" in response. If Europe stays on this road, don't be surprised to Dutch nationals needing visas to visit the USA while Czechs and Poles won't.

In the meantime, governments should be importing more qualified and talented people. They boost economies, and, in turn, that brings more jobs. More jobs and anti-discrimination laws with teeth... but is that too Anglo-Saxon for the Continent? I hope not, because that's what is needed.

Daily Show 1, Denmark 0

For a different take on Denmark, have a look at the "Danish Arrogance" report at the Daily Show. It's hilarious how the reporter flies to Denmark and, well, pretty much abuses people. One of the funniest segments is when he walks into a Middle Eastern restaurant and yells "It's OK, I'm not Danish. I'm on your side!" at the rather swarthy lads working behind the counter and then starts waving an American flag.

One take on the Toon Riots was that some local immigrants in Copenhagen got tired of being pissed on by the government. The Danish government didn't help by completely failing to comprehend the situation and standing around trying to look earnest and Nordic. The people in the Daily Show bit were about the same....them guys at Comdey Central must know something.

Wait, you mean I'm not street legal...

One of the bad points about the European Union is that it is a club. You can live for years here, but if you're in one of the sucky countries that won't let you have citizenship (well, as someone from the developed world anyway), you're stuck with permanent second-class status. That's not so bad in the US, Japan or other sovreign states. However, in the EU this means that when the economy goes four trotters skyward, your neighbors can move to Spain. You, however, are stuck.

That's why the European Union came up with the Directive on Long-Term Residency, which is supposed to give equal, or near equal, rights to those who live more than five years in a country. While laudable, two of the decent places in Europe, the UK and Ireland, opted out. So, while Latvians with no education can move to London in search of a job, an educated American who speaks fluent German, has a job and a decade living in Germany can't.

The EUObserver ran an article yesterday which highlighted this fact. Evidently the issue was over whether or not someone with a Russian long-term permit for a new member state, say like Estonia, could make use of the new directive to go to France while Estonian citizens could not. The answer is that the Russian couldn't go if the Estonian couldn't. Well, at least that bit of discrimination is equal.

Now, if the Commission would only get all the Western European countries who were supposed to enact the damn thing by the end of January to do so soon.

Welfare + Disconnected Youth = Bad Juju

Here is an interesting story (posted off of an English language website for those who don't read German) about tensions at a school in Germany. Basically, it seems the kids have taken over a school, and that there are some real endemic social problems among groups living in the poorer sections of Berlin.

One part of the article says that a letter was sent to local authorities from teachers, saying "The mood ... is dominated by aggression, lack of respect and ignorance," said the letter, adding: "We have reached a dead end and there is no way to turn around." (Wow, I could have sworn that this was a conversation between Americans about the Dutch government's latest anti-foreigner law proposal.) Sounds like bad juju that needs hard and soft measures if authorities in Berlin are to regain control of the situation. (Bet this kind of thing doesn't happen in Bavaria.)

Many immigrants and their descendants (and the same goes for 'native' Europeans themselves) have never had to be productive. This leads to some European politicians and policy wonks to hoot and holler about minorities, the "islamization" of Europe, scrounging immigrants, etc., but this is misplaced populism. Both immigrants and native' Europeans suffer from an addiction to easy welfare, meaning that it's possible to stay where you are, doing nothing and going nowhere.

Look at what the Dutch and Danish politicians are saying about migrants these days... rightist governments in both countries have been looking to cash in then play on sentiments among 'native' voters that it is they, not others, who should have access to the state's welfare ATM. The underlying assumption has been that all immigrants are uneducated goat herders/ borderline criminals and should be treated as such. This means all kinds of petty restrictions- overbearing bureaucracy, high fees, significant delays, forced classes on 'integration', periodic 'tests', special laws which only apply to them, heavily restricted citizenship possibilities (no dual nationals, for example), etc.- designed to drive the nasty foreigners (at least those most likely to be on welfare) out the country.

But it doesn't happen. The ones on welfare stay (they have nowhere to go to), while expats, who have jobs and pay tax, turn sour and leave. Or they just don't show up. While the Danes and Dutch are busy scaring off those who would have jobs, the US is full of people demonstrating for the possibility to be given the chance to work legally.

Moral of the story? If you expect immigants and their families to get along in your local society, don't give them welfare. Give them work, opportunities, hope for a decent life and full citizenship, and you'll get the top talent and the best of the manual labor pool... not the garbage at the bottom of the barrel.

BTW- It looks like the morons in charge of the Netherlands will lose the next election, but the new government will have a lot of damage to repair.

From the Funny Central European Sign Dept...

This sign is from somewhere in the Czech Republic, and says "Go crap with your dog in front of your own home." A nice one for anybody who's tripped over a doggie land mine in Prague, Paris, Amsterdam...

Everyone is talking about the illegals in the United States these days, but hey, let's do something for Americans! That's why I'm setting up this blog.... oh yeah, and giving the average Joe and Susan advice on starting to live those champagne wishes and caviar dreams.